HX Report
Irishman in the Middle East
QUARANTINE AIN’T HALF BAD WHEN YOU’VE GOT A LARGE BAR OF FRUIT & NUT CHOCOLATE
If you’ve been listening to world media in the last year MB will forgive your assumption that quarantine is some sort of hellish black hole. However, MB can assure followers that it ain’t necessarily so.
Now it could be.
Image if you were detained in some rat-infested prison for any reasonable length of time. And the guards were busy playing days-long poker sessions. And forgot to deliver food to you and the other inmates. You would be mightily cheesed off, not to mention ravenously hungry.
And if you happen to be under home quarantine in some middle eastern country, then other risks arise. The rules state that you must confine yourself to your room, not interact with other family members or house mates; and one of said family members or housemates must be your designated contact, and only contact, to deliver food, water, etc, etc.
But what if said family members or said house mates decide to binge-watch some Netflix series? One with more than three series at least. Then you might not see them for three or four days and turn into some skeletal creature under the bed sheets. Doesn’t bear thinking about dear followers. Really. It doesn’t.
Anyway, much as MB gave followers his sure-fire 100% guaranteed corona prevention programme a few weeks back (which you can read HERE), MB now gives followers more sure-fire quarantine advice to 100% get you through those long days when sole points of contact may be too busy to keep the quarantinee in sufficient sustenance.
A large bar of fruit & nut chocolate is your only man.
Fruit and nuts for protein, vitamins and minerals. And chocolate for pure pleasure.
MB recommends JH Whittaker & Sons brand from New Zealand. Given the size of their rugby players, it must be strong stuff. MB just now looked up their site and discovered the Whittaker lads are making chocolate since 1896. Need MB say more?!
And so dear followers, that is exactly how MB got through a 2-day quarantine period earlier this week, following a corona test – required due to close contact with a positive case work colleague, and the 2-day wait for the result. MB survived on a large bar of delicious Whittaker’s Fruit & Nut chocolate and not much else. Viva Whittaker’s!
Oh. and by the way lads, the result was negative. This gives MB’s above-mentioned corona prevention programme a 100% success rate to date. The only such programme on the entire planet with such a score:
Trial participants – 1 (MB)
Participants tested – 1 (MB)
Test result – Negative
Success rate – 100%
So there you have it dear followers.
Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.
Order your Whittaker’s chocolate now!
HX Report 
Brilliant!
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Thanks Tom. MB survived to tell the tale!
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